Navigating the Pain and Healing Journey of Sexual Abuse
Sexual abuse is one of the most devastating and confusing wounds a person can carry. It shatters trust, distorts identity, and often leaves survivors feeling isolated, ashamed, or silenced. Whether the abuse happened recently or years ago, its impact can touch every part of life—relationships, faith, mental and emotional health, and the ability to feel safe in your own body. Many survivors are left asking painful questions: How do I make sense of what happened to me? Can healing really happen? Where was God—and where is He now?
In this Navigating the Pain and Healing Journey of Sexual Abuse Pathway, you’ll hear from survivors, counselors, and faith leaders who bravely share their stories of pain, courage, and restoration. They speak honestly about the long road of healing, the complexities of trauma, and the hope that can be found even after profound harm. Healing from sexual abuse is not quick or easy, and it is not linear—but you do not have to walk it alone. This pathway is designed to remind you that your story is not over, your pain is seen, and redemption and healing are possible, even here.
Podcast Episodes:
How do we find people who can help us carry the weight of our stories? How do we learn to experience safety in community when relationships themselves have often been the source of deep pain?
Author, speaker, and podcaster Toni Collier has endured profound hardship throughout her life, including caring for a parent at a young age, surviving an abusive marriage, experiencing sexual betrayal, enduring sexual manipulation as a child, walking through two divorces, and more. Learning to trust others with the deepest parts of her story did not come easily. Yet through the healing power of what she calls a Confessional Community, Toni began experiencing layers of healing and freedom she never thought possible. In her latest book, Don't Try This Alone: How to Build Deep Community When You Want to Hide from Your Pain, Toni shares how authentic, vulnerable community can become one of the primary ways God brings healing through suffering.
In this episode, Davey and Toni talk about why confession and vulnerability are such essential parts of healing, how we can become safe people that others trust with their pain, and the emotional and spiritual dangers of isolation and hidden suffering.
If opening up to others has felt difficult—especially in seasons of pain, disappointment, or heartbreak—this conversation will remind you that healing was never meant to happen alone and that God often uses deep, authentic community as part of the restoration process He wants to invite you into.
How do we begin to move through the pain we’ve buried for so long? And how can our willingness to be vulnerable create space for others to share their own stories honestly?
Pastor Chris Durso never imagined how a single question could uncover years of suppressed pain. During a therapy session, the simple prompt—“How was your childhood?”—opened the door to long-buried memories of sexual abuse he experienced as a child at the hands of someone within the church. What followed was not only the resurfacing of those moments, but also the unexpected weight of PTSD and the beginning of a difficult, yet transformative, journey toward healing.
In this episode, Davey sits down with Chris to talk about what it looks like to confront childhood trauma, how to navigate PTSD in the context of community, and why authenticity in the church is so essential for true healing.
If you’ve ever experienced wounds from your past resurfacing in unexpected ways, this conversation is a reminder that even in the most painful parts of our story, Jesus is present—and healing is possible.
What happens when the escape you turn to begins to take over your life? How do you begin to heal the deeper wounds that often lie beneath addiction?
For author and podcaster Jonathon Seidl, the descent into alcoholism was rooted in unresolved childhood pain. After experiencing his father leaving at a young age, navigating an often difficult relationship with his stepfather, and enduring childhood sexual abuse, alcohol became a way to numb what he hadn’t yet faced—or invited Jesus to heal.
In his book, Confessions of a Christian Alcoholic: A Candid Conversation on Drinking, Addiction, and How to Break Free, Jonathon shares his raw and honest journey through disordered drinking and his path toward freedom.
In this episode, Davey sits down with Jonathon to explore the connection between escapism and addiction, the impact of trauma, and what recovery can look like through a Gospel-centered lens.
If you or someone you love has struggled with alcohol—even as a believer—this conversation offers a powerful reminder: there is hope. When we stop avoiding our pain and bring it honestly before Jesus, true healing can begin.
How do you find a way forward when shame from sexual abuse threatens to keep you stuck? What do you do with pornography and sexual addiction when they’re intertwined with the wounds you’ve carried for years?
For podcast host and entrepreneur Ken Freire, finding freedom from pornography and the lingering shame of childhood sexual abuse was anything but easy. The road was marked by isolation, secrecy, and deep internal struggle. But as Ken began to experience real healing, his pain was transformed into purpose. Today, he helps others navigate addiction, suffering, and restoration by sharing the stories of men who have found freedom on his podcast called Shame(less).
In this conversation, Davey sits down with Ken to talk about the isolation that often follows abuse and addiction, how to confront the shame surrounding pornography, and what it truly means to apply the gospel to our stories of brokenness.
If you’ve ever felt bound by the pain of your past, this episode is a powerful reminder that freedom is possible, shame does not get the final word, and you can step into a life marked by healing and hope.
How do you begin to disrupt the toxic family patterns you experienced as a child? What do you do with the dissonance between the outward appearance of your life and the reality of what was?
For Amy Duggar King, life was lived in two very different worlds. One appeared happy and carefree, marked by regular appearances on her extended family’s reality TV show, 19 Kids and Counting. The other was dark and frightening, shaped by toxic narcissistic patterns and abuse that she and her mother endured at home with her father. As Amy grew older, she began to recognize that the abuse she experienced in her family of origin was not isolated. Some of her cousins—who seemed to be living the peaceful, picture-perfect life she longed for—were navigating their own pain behind the scenes. Over time, Amy came to understand that what meets the eye is not always the full story. Through deep personal processing, she began breaking generational cycles and dismantling toxic family patterns. She shares her story in depth in her book, Holy Disruptor: Shattering the Shiny Facade by Getting Louder with the Truth.
In this episode, Davey and Amy discuss what narcissism can look like in families, the lasting effects of spiritual abuse, and what it means to become a Holy Disruptor—someone who courageously breaks cycles and patterns in the light of God’s truth.
If you’ve ever wondered how to undo the toxic patterns you grew up in, this conversation will encourage you to shatter the shiny facade and bring holy disruption to the places that need it most.
How do you bring order to the chaos of dysfunctional family patterns? What does it look like to experience lasting peace in the midst of relational disorder?
Pastor and Bible teacher Dr. Manny Arango knows firsthand what it’s like to grow up surrounded by chaos. Raised in a home where his father battled addiction, Dr. Manny became a stabilizing force for his mother, but what seemed like support at the time eventually revealed itself as a deeply dysfunctional dynamic. It wasn’t until he became a husband and father that he began to recognize how these patterns were impacting his own family.
Through the help of therapy and a deeper understanding of God’s design in Scripture, Dr. Manny discovered a powerful truth: true peace comes not from people-pleasing or control, but from aligning with God’s order. In his new book, Crushing Chaos: Calm Your Storms. Order Your Life. Find Your Peace, he unpacks how God is never intimidated by disorder and how He consistently brings order to chaos in the lives of His people.
In this rich conversation, Davey sits down with Dr. Manny to explore the importance of identifying not just immoral behaviors in our families of origin, but also the subtle and often overlooked patterns of dysfunction, how setting healthy boundaries can become a gateway to peace, and why understanding the biblical pattern of God’s redemptive order is key when navigating personal storms.
If you've ever felt overwhelmed by anxiety or like your life is spiraling into chaos, this episode will equip you with the insight and spiritual authority to confront disorder and embrace the peace that comes through God's divine order.
What happens when our lived experience doesn’t align with what we believe about God? How do we hold on to faith when trauma, suffering, or loss shatters our spiritual foundation?
Author and counselor Michael Cusick understands this tension intimately. As a survivor of childhood abuse, Michael found himself caught in self-destructive cycles that threatened his soul and relationships. Yet through his own healing journey, he discovered the profound impact our personal stories have on our attachment to God — and how restoring that attachment can transform our lives.
Now, through his intensive counseling work at Restoring the Soul and in his new book, Sacred Attachment: Escaping Spiritual Exhaustion and Trusting in Divine Love, Michael helps others reconnect with a God who is both safe and loving — even in the wake of deep wounds.
In this thoughtful conversation, Davey and Michael talk about what to do when your relationship with God feels fractured, why attachment is so important spiritually speaking, and why it seems like so many leaders are falling in our generation.
If you've struggled in your relationship with God because of the pain you have experienced, this episode is an invitation to begin healing, to rebuild trust, and to rediscover a sacred attachment with the One who will never let us go.
What do we do with the secrets that keep us hidden in shame and despair? How do we tell our story in such a way that we can experience the true freedom that God has for us?
For author, entrepreneur, and founder of Auntie Anne's Pretzels, Anne Beiler, the pain that came after losing a child in a tragic accident and the abuse she experienced at the hands of someone who should have helped her in her suffering, left her despairing and empty. It was only when she brought her secrets out of the dark and into the light that she was set free from the bondage of shame and pain that were set on destroying her. She shares her journey in her latest book, “The Secret Lies Within: An Inside Out Look at Overcoming Trauma and Finding Purpose in the Pain”.
In this tender conversation, Aubrey sits with Anne to talk about how the Holy Spirit can help us in our suffering, the power that is found in sharing our painful secrets, and how to let go of the shame that grips us.
If you've ever found yourself drowning in the shame of a secret from your past, this episode will encourage you to find a safe person to share your pain with and experience the freedom of being known and bringing the darkness into the light.
How do you begin to experience freedom from the sin that grips you? What does it look like to walk in purpose while still struggling with that which holds you back?
For author, pastor and podcaster, Tim Ross, finding his way towards healing after childhood sexual abuse led to his own patterns of pornography addiction, took some time. Through Jesus and therapy, Tim was able to learn how to get to the root of the bad fruit in his life. It was because of his own journey that he wanted to take others to a place of authenticity and vulnerability in the parts of their lives they often kept hidden. Through his podcast, The Basement, and latest book, Welcome to the Basement: An Upside Down Guide to Greatness, Tim explores how being real with our struggles can help us discover our true identity and experience the greatness God has for us.
In this conversation, Davey chats with Tim about how to mentor people in the way of Jesus, the ways in which our journeys toward freedom may differ, and how God will build purpose into our lives from our pain and struggles.
If you've ever wondered where you can lead with the truth of what you're walking through, this episode will remind you that true greatness can be found when we are willing to go low and be honest about our struggles and hurt.
What do you do when your past keeps showing up in your present? How do you address the pain from childhood as it presents itself in your adult life?
For Dr. Mark McNear, a childhood of every kind of abuse and trauma left him completely broken. From sexual abuse as a small boy and the harsh emotional abuse of his father to several traumatic events of violence and being hit by a drunk driver, Mark's entire life was marked by extreme pain. The wounds o f his past begin to manifest in his adult life through addiction, anxiety and depression. As a therapist, Mark had helped walk others through their pain and yet he needed to receive the same care he so often gave away. It was through the gentle compassion of his wife and others and the grace of God that Mark began the difficult journey towards healing. Mark would go on to share his personal journey to help others in theirs in his book, Finding My Words, A Ruthless Commitment To Healing Gently After Trauma.
In this vulnerable conversation, Eric and Mark discuss how to love people well in the midst of their addiction, finding hope in the process of healing, and seeing God's grace move when you are struggling with the grips of shame.
If healing has been a difficult journey and one that feels incomplete, this episode will show you that while you may not be instantaneously "fixed" this side of heaven, you can experience the richness of God's love and mercy in every new day through His gentle process of tending to your wounds.
Have you ever read the headlines of what is happening to Christians across the globe and felt a sense of helplessness? How do we step into the stories of suffering from those who are so far away?
Lily Meschi has a unique story. As an Iranian woman, she experienced the impact of a culture that didn't value her as a woman. When she was just 18 years old, she entered into an arranged marriage and nothing could have prepared her for what was to come. It was after a long season of experiencing abuse and toxicity in her marriage that Lily first heard the gospel. That moment forever changed her life as she was able to get away from the abuse and experience true freedom and redemption through Christ. Since then, she has seen God turn her pain into purpose as she has sought to share the gospel with others from her home country through the ministry she works for called Iran Alive. Not only has Lily seen redemption in her own story, but in countless others who were set free from an oppressive culture and who now walk in the freedom of a life in Jesus.
In this insightful conversation, Davey talks with Lily about how we tend to overcomplicate sharing the gospel, the power of redemption that comes when we serve in communities that were the source of our pain, and how to step into the suffering of those across the globe.
Your story and culture may look completely different from Lily's, but seeing how God can redeem the pain we encounter will serve to remind you that nothing is wasted.
WARNING: This episode contains conversations about suicide and suicide ideation and may not be suitable for all listeners/viewers.
How do you help a child in your life walk through an unimaginable trauma? How can you begin to navigate their emotions as well as your own when life turns upside down?
For Jessye and Ryan Wilden figuring out how to walk through their own pain of losing Ryan's sister, Rena, in a homicide/suicide that took her life and the life of her husband, Danny, has been difficult enough. Taking in their niece and nephew and navigating their grief and loss in losing both their parents has required wisdom and discernment from God for a circumstance that doesn't have a manual. Add to it the collective grief that people felt after losing two beloved members of their community, it could feel impossible to ever get out from under the depths of suffering. And yet, Jessye and Ryan found a way through as they relied on the Lord each step of the way. In her book, We Wrote Your Name In Color, Jessye shares the messy process of healing, redemption, and grace found in their story.
Davey sits down with Jessye and Ryan to talk about what you even do in the aftermath of the unimaginable, how to walk kids through their own pain and healing, and the value of having a community in the midst of tragedy.
You may never walk through something as painful as the Wilden's have, but the way they've seen God in the middle of their heartbreak will encourage you as you navigate your own valley.
How often have you found yourself stuck in the past? How is looking back keeping you from moving forward?
Best-selling author, speaker, and founder of A21, a worldwide anti-trafficking organization, Christine Caine knows how pain, trauma, and tragedy can keep a person stuck. Having experienced abandonment, being adopted, abuse and trauma as a child, Christine is well acquainted with the schemes of the enemy to hold her back from the purposes of God. In her latest book, Don't Look Back: Getting Unstuck and Moving Forward with Passion and Purpose, Christine explores Jesus' words in Luke 17:32, "remember Lot's wife," and how looking back kept her and how it keeps us from experiencing the fullness of God's promises, especially in our most painful moments. When our eyes get stuck on our circumstances, past or present, we can miss the invitation from Christ to look forward to a future full of hope.
In this episode, Aubrey has the privilege to sit with Christine to talk about what can get us stuck in the first place, what can happen when we constantly look backwards, and why it is so important to know the promises of God so that we can begin to move forward in faith.
Whatever is keeping you stuck, don't miss the opportunity Jesus is inviting you into as you trust Him when everything around you changes. Let this conversation be a guide for you as you turn towards Him and His promises.
How can we look at our lives and see God's faithfulness throughout the knots of disappointment, betrayal, criticism or abuse? How can we trust the goodness of God when so much has gone wrong in our lives?
For Bible teacher and author Beth Moore, her life has been a series of knots. From being sexually abused as a child to extreme criticism from those who proclaim Christ, Beth's life has been full of pain to untangle. But with every difficulty, every pain, Beth has seen her desperate need for Jesus even more. It has been through the twists and turns of life that she has come to realize that no person and no set of circumstances can satisfy like the love of Jesus. Openly and honestly, Beth has journeyed this path with the Lord for a lifetime to find that He is worth every step of it.
In this profound conversation, Beth talks with Davey and Aubrey about how the crucible of life can bring about a fountain of deep passion for the Lord, the only way to endure criticism as a leader, and how our crushing can lead to more of the Holy Spirit in our lives.
If you need encouragement from a seasoned believer to finish your race well in the midst of all that you are facing, this episode will give you the strength to keep fighting the good fight of faith.
So often, we tend to think very little about our story and how our past impacts our present. But, what if the key to healing the wounds we are experiencing now is inextricably tied to engaging our whole story including our past?
For professional counselor and podcaster Adam Young, it was when he began to engage his story, the wounds of his past and his family of origin, that he started to see the ways in which God wanted to meet him in his pain. This idea of not just dealing with the symptoms of past wounds, but looking at the arc of our lives became the most important tool Adam had in his private practice with others who were wanting to heal from the past. It also connected perfectly with what we know to be true about the human brain and how it makes sense of the things that have happened to us.
In this deeply profound conversation, Davey and Adam talk about why it is so important to engage our stories, the difference between trauma and adversity, how to handle people who have wounded us, and how this work can lead to healing and health in our relationships, including our closest ones like in our marriage.
If you've ever wondered how to connect the dots between your earliest memories and what you are experiencing now, this episode is full of insightful wisdom on how to step into your story with compassion and curiosity.
Every parent looks into the eyes of their young child with hopeful anticipation for their future. What do you do when the dreams you had seem to shatter and you find your relationship with your child not what you had imagined? How do you continue to love well when their choices are taking them down a road of relational disconnection, personal pain or destruction?
Through her own parenting journey and by watching others, Mary DeMuth has learned how to surrender her ideas of what should be and lean into what is when it comes to her children. In fact, her most recent book, Love, Pray, Listen: Parenting Your Wayward Adult Kids with Joy, is a guide to help any parent navigating the murky waters of parenting adult children who have chosen a path contrary to what was hoped for.
As a sexual abuse survivor, Mary had to learn how to parent well while healing from her own story. She also had to learn to trust God in the messiness of her own children's stories and not to parent out of fear, but instead rely on God's love for her kids to be enough. By looking at Scripture and the first example of wayward children in the Garden of Eden, Mary has found comfort and solace in knowing that God not only sees her pain, but also understands the journey she is on.
In this raw conversation, Mary and Davey talk about how our healing can often come through our giftings, why formulas don't work in parenting and the power of surrendering our kids and their journeys to the loving care of the Lord.
No matter where you are in parenting, this episode will help you remember that ultimately God is in control of your children's lives and that no matter what, He cares for them and for you.
So often when it comes to the topic of singleness, there is this sense that many believe significance comes only when you finally find "the one." But the truth is, leading a life full of purpose doesn't have to wait until there is a significant other. In fact, singleness, no matter how long that season lasts, can be a fulfilling, purposeful time that the Lord uses in your life and in the lives of those around you.
For Mandy Hale, it was coming to this realization that provided her the freedom to find joy in fulfilling her life's purpose as a single woman. Rather than focusing on the one kind of love she didn't have, she learned to see the love all around her through friendship, community, and family. She was able to connect with others through her writing and not get in stuck in waiting for a future with her present right in front of her.
In this episode, Davey talks with Mandy about finding purpose right where you are, the impact the pandemic and other difficult life events can have on a single person, and paying attention to the love you already have in your life.
Whether you are single or just waiting for something in your life, this conversation will remind you to choose to live fully in whatever circumstances you find yourself in.
Sometimes life can break your heart after one unexpected tragedy. But, what about when circumstances seems to break your heart all throughout your story? How do you find healing when it seems heartache is woven into the fabric of your life?
For Christian recording artist Blanca, it felt like her whole life was marred by heartbreak. As a child, she was a victim of sexual abuse. As an adult, she lost both her parents and went through a devastating divorce. Finding healing in life when it seemed like the pieces were shattered has been difficult, but through her journey with the Lord, through her music and with the help of a counselor, Blanca has begun to experience healing from her wounds.
In this episode, Davey sits down with Blanca to talk about facing the pain in order to heal, the value in sharing your healing process with others, and how creativity can be a tool God uses to mend a broken heart.
Healing is never an easy endeavor, but Blanca's story is proof that God is in the business of binding up the wounds of the brokenhearted.
What do you do when you realize the things you've been taught don't quite match up with God's Word? How do you navigate when what you believed to be true of the body of Christ doesn't hold up when you need care and protection?
For Carlie Tice Cleveland, experiencing an abusive relationship was painful enough yet more hurt was heaped upon her when the response of Christian leaders was shaming and blaming. It was through that difficult season that Carlie began to rightfully question some of the lessons she had learned through the years about purity.
Her questions led her to untangle some prescriptive religious rules that ignored the heart of God's purpose in pursuing purity. In this episode, Carlie and Davey talk about the heart of the matter when it comes to sexual ethics, warning signs in abusive relationships and the importance of deconstructing ideas that don't align with scripture.
This conversation is so important for those who know or love young people who may be wrestling with what purity truly means.
There are certain issues that the church is silent on too often. Whether it’s from fear of controversy or just not knowing what to say, it’s all too easy for many Christians to be afraid of talking about topics that can seem “messy.”
Jackie Hill Perry is not one of those people. Having dealt with sexual abuse, pornography, gender confusion, same-sex attraction, and more, Jackie is well versed in these topics that many Christians fear to talk about.
And as an author, speaker, poet, and more, Jackie has found herself in a unique position to speak up about these important issues.
This week on the Nothing Is Wasted Podcast, Jackie sits down with Davey to share some of her story and how it relates to pain, healing, redemption, and more.
Nona Jones had what looked on the outside like success. She got a job at a Fortune 100 company at only 23, and her professional life only seemed to go up and to the right from there. Married to a pastor and with a deep faith of her own, it seemed that Nona had the “perfect” Christian life. But under the surface, trauma that had gone unaddressed built up until it could no longer be ignored, and Nora found herself in a crisis. Was all her success really enough? In her newest book Success from the Inside Out, Nona talks about how to deal with your past to have real success in the present. Nona sits down with Davey to share her story and how she’s learned to overcome her past traumas and help others do the same.
If you asked any couple in ministry what they wanted their lives to look like, their description would probably sound a lot like Clayton and Sharie King. They have two kids, their own hugely successful ministries, and they spend a lot of their time traveling and speaking together.
Clayton and Sharie are no strangers to pain, however. Sharie’s story especially is one of God’s rescue from one of the darkest places you can imagine. Clayton and Sharie sit down with Davey to talk about her story, doing ministry together, and more.
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Bonus Episodes:
Sexual abuse and assault is a pain that is familiar to far too many. This extremely intimate wounding at the hands of another can leave scars and shame that last a lifetime. But they don’t have to. Healing and wholeness are available to us. That is the story of Nothing Is Wasted Ministries’ very own Aubrey Sampson. In this bonus episode for our Nothing Is Wasted Monthly Partners, Aubrey shares her painful story of sexual assault and abuse, and how God led her down a path of healing to not only overcome that pain but to use it as momentum to help other women who’ve gone through the same thing.
Read more of Aubrey’s story in her book, Overcomer.
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Pain to Purpose Coaching
Need someone to walk with you through your valley? Our Nothing is Wasted Certified Coaches are ready to help you find your way from pain into purpose. Hire yours today by scheduling a free connection call and we’ll help you started with one-on-one help.
Have you found this Pathway helpful? Be sure to check out our other Pathways for more inspiring stories of hope in the face of tragedy, trauma and pain.
Let these Pathways be a roadmap for you on your healing journey.
Why does it sometimes feel like different parts of us are pulling in opposite directions? How do we begin to notice, understand, and care for the parts of ourselves that are trying to cope with pain, loss, and grief?
For psychologist and author Dr. Audrey Davidheiser, understanding Internal Family Systems (IFS) has transformed both her personal and professional journey. Through her own experiences—including the loss of her father—and years of helping others navigate grief, she has seen how IFS offers a compassionate framework for understanding the many parts that make up our inner world. Rather than viewing these parts as problems to be fixed, IFS invites us to approach them with curiosity, compassion, and care, recognizing that each part is often trying to protect us or help us survive difficult experiences. In her book, Grieving Wholeheartedly: Bringing Healing to Every Part of Your Soul, Dr. Davidheiser explores how the principles of IFS can be applied to the grieving process through a thoughtful Christian lens, offering practical tools for healing and growth.
In this conversation, Davey and Dr. Davidheiser discuss what Internal Family Systems is, how different parts can emerge in response to grief and hardship, and how understanding these parts can help us move toward deeper healing and wholeness.
If you've ever felt torn between conflicting emotions, wondered why one part of you wants to move forward while another wants to hold back, or struggled to make sense of your reactions in seasons of loss, this episode will encourage you to approach yourself with greater compassion. You'll discover that every part of you has a story to tell, and that through the healing presence of Jesus, those parts can be understood, cared for, and brought toward greater wholeness.