SCRIPTURE:

Isaiah 55:8-9
8 For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. 9 For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.

Psalm 147:5 (ESV)
5 Great is our Lord, and abundant in power; his understanding is beyond measure.

DEVO:

When my late wife was killed, I found myself asking this one question over and over and over. It’s a simple question laced with complicated implications. It’s one I’m sure you’ve found yourself asking many times as well. 

WHY?

There is certainly nothing wrong with this question. In fact, for a season I believe we need to explore this question in order to enter into the depths of mourning and a deeper relationship with God. Why did this happen? Why me? Why would God allow this? Why does no one else seem to understand? 

The problem I ran into as I was asking "why," however, is that I never received a good answer. The sobering truth is, for most of us, there really is no good answer or reason for our pain. It seems absolutely senseless. 

I found myself demanding of God an explanation, but deep down I knew that an explanation wasn't going to bring Amanda back. An explanation would never ease the pain. Instead of an explanation, what I really needed was restoration. I needed healing. I needed to know that God would take away this pain and heal me completely. I needed to know that He cared, that He was there, and He knew something I didn’t know.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve not given my own kids an explanation for something I’ve asked them to do. Sometimes it’s simply because we’re in a hurry and I don’t have time to explain my rationale. But most of the time it’s because I know they wouldn’t understand it. Their little minds can’t comprehend my reasoning behind what I’m requesting of them. And what I’m really asking them to do is to trust me and take a step. And as their father who wants good things for them, I know that it will be much better for them as they do trust me.

If there is a disparity between my kids’ abilities to understand my intentions and my thoughts, how much more must there be between my understanding and God's ways? He is all-knowing, all-present, and has existed since the beginning of time! His wisdom stretches the span of history and into eternity! I truly believe God, in his infinite wisdom and love, gives us everything we would ask for if we knew everything He knows.

Now I understand this parallel breaks down for many of us who have experienced narcissistic, self-centered, negligent or even abusive fathers. Our traumatizing experiences with or our disappointments in our earthly father can easily bleed over into how we view our Heavenly Father. Can I reassure you, however, that our Heavenly Father is not, nor can He be, anything but kind, good-hearted, loving, and gracious. In everything he does, in everything he allows into our lives, though we may not understand his reasoning, we can trust His heart.

So while "why" is a good question, I wonder what would happen if we switched to asking “WHAT." What are you trying to teach me, Lord? What do you want to do through this? What do you want to do through me? What do you want me to do next? I believe the answers to these questions are much more within our reach of understanding than the larger "why" questions. And I believe that as we walk in obedience, God begins to shine his light where we’re foggy and we begin to understand more fully the depth of God’s wisdom, mercy, and grace in our tragedy. 

QUESTIONS FOR REFLECTION AND JOURNALING:

1. What “why" questions have you been asking God?

2. What “what” questions could you switch to asking? 

3. As you ask these “what” questions, what next steps do you believe God is showing you to take?

PRAYER:

Lord, sometimes it’s so difficult to understand what You’re doing in my life. Sometimes I want to know what You’re thinking. But I know Your ways are much higher than my ways. Your purposes are bigger than mine. And I know You can be trusted. Help me to fully believe this, feel this, and experience this to be true. Help me to walk in obedience to Your Word and, as I do, reveal to me more and more of Your character.